Tau is a traditional title for a Gnostic Bishop. It’s customary to choose an ecclesiastical name when you become a bishop and I chose Sciam. Sciam is a Latin word meaning “I will know” and it is to remind me that my primary goal is to have a direct personal relationship with God. Knowledge imparted by experiencing God directly is called “gnosis” and is the philosophy of Gnosticism in a nutshell – that every person can have a personal relationship with God, without the need of any intermediaries between you and God.
I’ve spent my life trying to find God and what God wanted me to do. I was raised a Pentecostal Christian. I preached as a teenager, but the more I studied towards ordination, the more I found out that I really didn’t agree with my denomination’s ideas of righteousness and interpretation of scripture. So, around the age of 18, I left my parents’ church.
I soon joined an organization based upon the structure of Freemasonry called the Ordo Templi Orientis (OTO) and was introduced to a Gnostic philosophy called Thelema. I began serving as deacon in their Gnostic Mass. Eventually, I ran my own OTO body.
When I was around 24, I moved to New Orleans and it turned out to be a great learning experience for me. I spent a couple of years attending a Vodou hounfor (not like you see on TV. It’s really a lot like Catholicism) with the famous mambo Sallie Ann Glassman and her then consort Shane Norris. Sallie ran a body of the OTO and that would be the last time I actively participated in the OTO. When I left there, I left active participation in the OTO. I still considered myself a Thelemite, but didn’t participate with any organizations.
After I left there, I spent a couple of years with the Gaudiya Vaisnavas (Hare Krishnas). I left there and that was my last religion that I was involved with. After that, I still followed the philosophy of Thelema, but didn’t associate myself with any religion. Eventually, I contacted one of my initiators in the OTO and, with his help, I opened a body of a “church” called Ecclesia Gnostica Universalis (EGnU). It was a body based upon the philosophy of Thelema and was started as an alternative to the “church” associated with the OTO called Ecclesia Gnostica Universalis. As I had problems with seeing Crowley’s Gnostic Mass as a proper Mass to actually perform (it included a nude priestess, body fluids in the eucharist, etc.) then this was a much better fit for me.
March 22nd, 2008, I gathered with my then fiancee on Mt. Arabia in Georgia along with Tau Sir Hasirim (Allen Greenfield), Tau Naamah, and Tau HRMASht. They laid hands on me and made me “now and forever a Gnostic Bishop in all Apostolic and Gnostic lineages”. In July of that year, my daughter was born. In November of that year, I was appointed a Bishop of EGnU.
Being a parent, my own EGnU body never got off the ground. I couldn’t devote the time to it. EGnU, the Ordo Templi Orientis, and any body based upon the structure or influenced by Freemasonry require everyone to be at least 18 years of age. It’s not a family activity. When you’re a parent, you don’t really have the time to spend a lot of time solely with adults. Your child is your priority. I carried on email correspondence with people, directed them to others, gave out information, etc. but, aside from one instance where my fiancee kept my daughter while I met someone and ordained them a priest, everything remained solely online. Realizing my limitations, I finally closed the local body altogether.
My fiancee and I eventually split up. This was a perfect time for me to go to the roots of Freemasonry and join a local Masonic lodge. When we were living together but not married, I never got a response from them. After we split up, I got a response and was directed to the local Masonic lodge where my uncle once served as lodgemaster. I joined and moved up through the initiations to Master Mason. I wear my Masonic ring today with pride and remain a member of my local Masonic lodge.
As they say, God works in mysterious ways. Thelema (as well as Freemasonry) is based heavily on the Jewish Kabbalah. The Kabbalah itself fits many people’s definition of Gnostic. It is rooted in the Torah and has inspired Judaism for centuries. Thelema is a self-interpreted philosophy. No one can tell you how to interpret the precepts for yourself so you find people who have quite different philosophies all under the umbrella of Thelema.
In late 2010, I came into contact with Reform Judaism and realized that Thelema, as I had interpreted it for the past 20 years, was really Jewish philosophy. I began attending the local synagogue, met with the rabbis and started the year long conversion process to Judaism. I stepped down from my position with EGnU, turned the EGnU website over to another bishop, and stopped promoting Thelema.
The week preceding December 10, 2011, I met with the Beit Den, underwent hatafat dam brit (drawing blood from the circumcision site for those already circumcised), and immersed in a mikveh. On December 10th, I had a public ceremony in front of my synagogue where I embraced my new identity as a Jew. I feel that this is where God has led me and I don’t think I will ever stop learning about how to be a better Jew. This website doesn’t exist to instruct others about Judaism. I’m not qualified. It exists as a place I can share my thoughts and my journey with you.
Anyone who wishes may contact Tau Sciam by emailing him at tausciam@moderngnosis.org.
